Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
id be glad to
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
Randomize
