i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
Randomize
