They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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