She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
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