Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
Randomize