no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Randomize
