Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Randomize