I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize
