Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
Randomize
