Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Randomize
