He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
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