Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
two words...techno handjob
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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