That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
Randomize
