Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Randomize
