so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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