So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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