I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
