Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
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