just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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