I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Randomize
