So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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