1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
You smell like stripper and shame
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Randomize
