I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
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