How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
Randomize
