The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
Randomize
