Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
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