okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
Why can't burritos get me drunk
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Randomize
