is your mom at the bar?
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
I just had sex on a roof
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Randomize