yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
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