All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
