We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
Randomize