I wish I only lived at night.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
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