She is in my trunk
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
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