How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize
