but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
