I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
Randomize
