I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
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