The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Randomize
