i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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