i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
Randomize
