it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
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