She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Randomize
