My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
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