I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
Me too!
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
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