I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
Randomize
