i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
Your penis caused this!
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