Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
