I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Randomize
