mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
There are leaves in my underwear?
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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