this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
